Thursday, May 6, 2010

Ferguson 'power'

24. 04.2010.

Alex Ferguson, chairman of Man. Utd. yesterday dismissed talk of him stepping down as he has many times during the last decade. His gum chewing continues unabated and is in rude health, despite his advancing years.

Ferguson' chewing
years could have powered all of
Greater Manchester.

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

U.S. space wars. 24.04.2010.

24.04.2010.
America's latest space launch, the X37B, looks like a mini-Shuttle. Its purpose and cost hasn't been divulged by the Pentagon. We are given to understand however that it's a kind of universal CCTV (my description) in that it can see anywhere in the world from on high. It was launched from Cape Canaveral.

While all eyes are on X37B( even though it has got a clunky name), or the U.K. Election, or the BP oil spill, the launch of an even more sinister piece of space equipment from California has been obscured. It carries the model of a new weapon that can hit any target from space within one hour. The 'Prompt Global Strike' is the 'conventional weapon of the future'. It could, say its makers, hit 'Osama Bin Laden's cave'.

XR7B's
spy spaceship shields sinister
Prompt Global Strike launch.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Vladimir Putin cares. 03.06.2010.

Vladimir Putin cares. 03.06.2010.

Vladimir Putin, the Russian Prime Minister, he of the action man physique and wearing a red monogrammed jacket, visited Franz Josef Land, exercised by the plight of the polar bear as the Arctic world shrinks at a rate of knots due to global warming.

He shook the paw of a sedated bear and urged it to 'be healthy'.

President Putin last year called a halt to the annual seal cull in the Russian White Sea region and is a strong but caring ruler.

Putin shakes the paw of
White Russian, brings the Russian
Bear in from the cold.

Vlad. the campaigner,
bareback rider, calls cull off,
cares for polar bears.

Christ almighty debt 03.06.2010.

The Governor of the Bank of England, Mervyn King, has calculated that the 1.3 trillion 'public' finance bill owed by Great Britain translates as 1.1 million every day since Jesus was born.

Each day since Jesus
was born we've owed one million.
Oh God! Christ Almighty!

'Car crash' Labour...more black holes. 02.06.2010.

May 2nd, 2010.

Following Gordon Brown's campaign trail insult in which, off-air, he described a lifetime Labour supporter as 'that awful woman' and described her a 'just some bigot' after she raised concerns with him about immigration 'from Eastern Europe', the P.M. unelect appeared alongside a cabinet line-up outside a Birmingham community centre at a rally, only to be derailed by a car crash nearby.
The circumstances of the crash were galling. The car driver, a Labour supporter, was ploughed into by a bin wagon full of men(who were real labourers) heckling the Labour line-up, which was labouring under the Brown gaffe. Journalists quickly scurried from observing the 'car-crash'of 'Bigotgate' to the real car crash arguably caused by, err, ?Labour?
Brown is having to dig ever deeper to rescue his party from calumny, and said he would 'try harder, dig deeper, work harder' on the trail.

'Try harder and dig
deeper'. Would that be as in
black holes, Mr Brown.?

PM unelect
labours uphill after car
crash follows 'car crash'.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Brown's two cheeks exposed. 01 06 2010.

Brown's cheeks exposed. 1.06.10.

This was yesterday's debacle in which the P.M. unelect was heard calling a member of the public 'that awful woman' into his portable microphone. He told others in the courtesy car that the Rochdale pensioner, grandmother and lifelong Labour supporter who had quizzed him about immigration 'from Europe' was a 'bigot'. The woman, A Mrs Gillian Duffy, was subsequently apologised to in person for half an hour by Mr.Brown. at her home. She sold her story to a newspaper for £250,000 two days later.

Poetic justice;
Brown's two cheeks exposed
by Northern Duffy.

Brown's black hole 01.06.2010.

A car crash involving a labour supporter and some binmen heckling from a bin wagon derailed the public 'meeting' outside a Birmingham community centre, during which all the Labour Party faithful had lined up for a photo-call. Journalists legged it several hundred yards to the scene of the crash.
During the rally, brown talked about trying harder and digging deeper.

'Try harder and dig
deeper'. Would that be as in
black holes, Mr.Brown?