George Osborne seemed to have decided to announce his austerity budget(yesterday) on the same day that England played Slovenia in the World Cup, possibly with the idea that we'd all be too busy watching England win or lose to care about it.
Osborne pushes cuts
in welfare on Engerland
day. Hey, that's crafty!
Friday, June 25, 2010
World Cup continued...23.06.2010.
The Nation's electricity consumption shot up at half-time during the England v. Slovenia match as nervous fans had a cuppa. The National Grid recorded a huge power surge. Pizza Hut had a 35% increase in sales during the match. Three million fans poured into pubs, downing 18m pints, one for every three Britons.
England's powers surge;
But hang on, that's only for
pizzas, tea and pints.
Fans pour into pubs,
pour down eighteen million pints
as goal trickles in.
England drinking shoots
up, joy and sorrow are downed
in equal measure.
England's powers surge;
But hang on, that's only for
pizzas, tea and pints.
Fans pour into pubs,
pour down eighteen million pints
as goal trickles in.
England drinking shoots
up, joy and sorrow are downed
in equal measure.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Ancient skeleton found. 22.06.2010.
22.06.2010. Source: The Times.
A 3.6 m year-old skeleton, older than 'Lucy' has been found in Ethiopia and shows that one of humanity's earliest ancestors could walk on two feet 'surprisingly well'. It shows the elongation of the leg came about earlier than had been supposed, inferring earlier proficiency at walking.
We could probably
have kicked a football a lot
better in those days.
A 3.6 m year-old skeleton, older than 'Lucy' has been found in Ethiopia and shows that one of humanity's earliest ancestors could walk on two feet 'surprisingly well'. It shows the elongation of the leg came about earlier than had been supposed, inferring earlier proficiency at walking.
We could probably
have kicked a football a lot
better in those days.
World cup sickies. 22.06.2010.
Absencecare, a firm which 'helps firms monitor and manage' staff absences has predicted that 'sickies' (absence from work) will rise to 8.3% of the overall workforce, 56% more than on an average day tomorrow when England play Slovenia in the World Cup.
'Unheppy' team under
Capello pull rank and may
pull sickie on day.
'Unheppy' team under
Capello pull rank and may
pull sickie on day.
More vuvuzela...22.06.2010.
22.06.2010.
The presence of vuvuzelas continues to dominate the coverage of the World Cup. Ronaldo, the Brazil and former Man.United player said the noise made it difficult for anyone on the pitch to concentrate.
Bugling on pitch while
oceans are burning pitch is
fiddling while Rome burns.
The presence of vuvuzelas continues to dominate the coverage of the World Cup. Ronaldo, the Brazil and former Man.United player said the noise made it difficult for anyone on the pitch to concentrate.
Bugling on pitch while
oceans are burning pitch is
fiddling while Rome burns.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
I pad fad 05.06.2010.
The waiting list for the IPad is slowly growing in the UK. This year's 'must-have product' which will soon be superceded by the next gizmo will retail for £429. and will be available at Argos stores.
Incontinence pads
soak up bilge whereas IPads
merely produce it.
Hurry Hurry.While
stocks last. Must end soon.
Argos it right now!
Incontinence pads
soak up bilge whereas IPads
merely produce it.
Hurry Hurry.While
stocks last. Must end soon.
Argos it right now!
More I pad
29.05.2010.
Queues of people formed outside the Apple shop in Regent Street overnight as the Ipad was about to be launched in Britain. The tablet style computer is about £600.The launch has been worldwide. There was a 200 metre queue in Sydney, Aus. where Apple staff ran up and down the line exchanging high-fives with folk who stared straight ahead and had no eye-contact with each other.
That's my pad and by
the way it's not for sharing,
just for me, me, me.
With I-pad I can
look at more stuff and not have
to look at people.
Queues of people formed outside the Apple shop in Regent Street overnight as the Ipad was about to be launched in Britain. The tablet style computer is about £600.The launch has been worldwide. There was a 200 metre queue in Sydney, Aus. where Apple staff ran up and down the line exchanging high-fives with folk who stared straight ahead and had no eye-contact with each other.
That's my pad and by
the way it's not for sharing,
just for me, me, me.
With I-pad I can
look at more stuff and not have
to look at people.
Fishing laws.07.06.2010.
07.06.2010.
A law to reduce the taking of large fish as specimens and for any other reason comes into force at this, the beginning of the coarse fishing season, reports the Times Fishing correspondent.
Telling fishy tails
may land fly guys in the drink,
hook, line and sinker.
Anglers fishing for
compliments will be saying
'Cod, it was THIS small'.
A law to reduce the taking of large fish as specimens and for any other reason comes into force at this, the beginning of the coarse fishing season, reports the Times Fishing correspondent.
Telling fishy tails
may land fly guys in the drink,
hook, line and sinker.
Anglers fishing for
compliments will be saying
'Cod, it was THIS small'.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Bloody Sunday 21.06.2010.
Lord Saville's report on the Bloody Sunday (Northern Ireland) killings of 1972, after being trawled through court, has finally concluded the verdict of unlawful killing (after twelve years and tens of millions) that we knew it was all along. Twelve innocent citizens, peacefully protesting, were gunned down by the British Army.
Exactly three weeks ago to this day, there was another Bloody Sunday, when peaceful protestors, amongst them Mairead Maguire (veteran of the Irish Struggle for independence and Nobel Peace prize winner) some children and old people, one or two European M.P.s, and a famous Swedish crime writer in a flotilla trying to deliver paper, pencils, jam, concrete, sweets, hope and most importantly solidarity to the Gazan people were gunned down at close range in international waters at 5a.m. by the Israeli Defence Forces, who first surrounded the main Turkish boat with gunboats then sent down soldiers from helicopters to blitz those on board the vessel. At least nine were killed, many were seriously injured and many are still missing. Some were forced to watch as dogs were brought in to maul the dead. Others were cuffed and forced to lie face down in the blood and glass. One woman was sadistically shown a photo of her dead partner 36 hours after he was killed and asked to 'identify' him. His face was by now blown up. She recognised his mouth. Hundreds were imprisoned without charge and stripped of their possessions. Just another day, another dollar for Israel then...
That Bloody Sunday's
a paler pink version
of this Dirty Sunday.
Business as usual
for the IDF who gunned
down brave missionaries.
Exactly three weeks ago to this day, there was another Bloody Sunday, when peaceful protestors, amongst them Mairead Maguire (veteran of the Irish Struggle for independence and Nobel Peace prize winner) some children and old people, one or two European M.P.s, and a famous Swedish crime writer in a flotilla trying to deliver paper, pencils, jam, concrete, sweets, hope and most importantly solidarity to the Gazan people were gunned down at close range in international waters at 5a.m. by the Israeli Defence Forces, who first surrounded the main Turkish boat with gunboats then sent down soldiers from helicopters to blitz those on board the vessel. At least nine were killed, many were seriously injured and many are still missing. Some were forced to watch as dogs were brought in to maul the dead. Others were cuffed and forced to lie face down in the blood and glass. One woman was sadistically shown a photo of her dead partner 36 hours after he was killed and asked to 'identify' him. His face was by now blown up. She recognised his mouth. Hundreds were imprisoned without charge and stripped of their possessions. Just another day, another dollar for Israel then...
That Bloody Sunday's
a paler pink version
of this Dirty Sunday.
Business as usual
for the IDF who gunned
down brave missionaries.
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