Bullygate(2)

The Times et. al. report that the National Bullying Helpline was contacted by staff working for the P.M. who reported that his bullying was causing them distress.
 The Bullying Helpline makes a lot of money out of legally assisting people to stand up to bullying behaviour. The Independent reports 'frightened clerks,  badly-treated phone operatives and other 'bruised staff' in the fall-out.
 This follows Andrew Rawnsley's catalogue of the PM's Cabinet Secretary's handling of staff complaints.
Three  head honchos at the N.B.H. have resigned. Expect a few kickings within the Cabinet.

N.B.H. accuses
P.M. of G.B.H. Blows
traded on the floor.

Bullying in school
playground reported by 'Help-
ourselves-and-earn-line'

Bullygate

Allegations that the P.M. Gordon Brown is a bully were allegedly made following the revelations in Andrew Rawnsley's book that Brown has intimidated Cabinet members and staff, revealed the press yesterday.
 The Bullying Helpline, chaired by a Christine Pratt has weighed in and threatened to expose the 'bullying' behavoiur.
The next day three of her staff resigned and the rumblings in the aftermath of what I will call 'Bullygate' go on intra-cabinet and between the allegedly aggrieved parties, various victims and perpetrators of bullying. Peter Mandelson joined in the melee with the thought that some people (the P.M.) had 'better things to do' than to concern themselves with whether or not they were bullies.

Bullying in school
playground; as reported by 'Help-
ouselves-and- earn-line'

Bulleygate witness
Mandy hits back with 'We've got
a country to run!'

Banana theft

The Crown Prosecution Service, it has been reported in the broadsheets, spent £20,000 on the trial of a man first accused and later acquitted of stealing a 25p banana form an Italian restaurant in Birmingham's Bull Ring shopping Centre before it opened at 8.45 a.m.
 District  Crown Prosecutor, Martin Lindop said 'It is not the Court that determines whether we proceed with a prosecution  but whether there  is sufficient evidence for a realistic prospect of conviction  and it is in the public interest'.


Gand Theft Banana.
Italian Job puts the skids
on British justice.

Japanese barbers

In Japan, the ancient art of the barber in which a gentlemen would be washed  in leisurely and indulgent fashion before a shave over a sink is being undercut by a huge quick turnaround outfit called QB Net which opened its first low-cost no-wash salon in Tokyo ten years ago and now shaves the heads of 30,000 customers a day. Japan's Barber's Union has tried to claim that QB Net's no-wash practice is unhygienic and even dangerous but there is no stopping the leviathan enterprise.

Barbaric practice
is big in Japan; cut-price
shaves sink old barbers.

HP Sauce (2006)

June Haikus 06

3rd June; Staff, workers at the H.P.sauce factory at Swindon are having talks with the management in a last-bid attempt to prevent its sale to a Dutch company.

So who's going Dutch?
Family sauce exported,
sold down the river.
British bottle gone.
No H.P. agreement though,
just Hollandaise sauce.
H.P. staff browned off.
Time to sell off H of P.
(Holland won't buy it.)

Tim Waterstone today failed for the seventh time in his bid to buy back Waterstone's from its owners, W.H.Smith.
Chapter Seven closed
Tim's bad buy-back-books bid stalls;
no longer novel.
Orange layoffs...
Orange sliced staff.Since
Navel-gazing it's blossomed.
Staff peeled off? They're juice

Ruth Turner

20th Jan.07Haiku
Ruth Turner, one of Tony Blair's senior advisers was arrested on suspicion of perverting the course of jutice by police investigating the "cash for honours" scandal. As director of government relations inside Downing Street she was arrested under caution at 6.30a.m. at home and bailed without charge after questioning.
Ms. Turner , who acts as both the "gatekeeper" and the "go-between"for the P.M.had been questioned in September about documents and e-mails raising queries about which labour donors should be placed on the Honours list. A police statement made it clear that they were unsatisfied about the accuracy of the answers she gave. She could face further interviews....

Will it Turn out to

be Ruthgate as Gatekeeper's

Turned out of her bed.